Posts tagged: evolution

My Edgewalker Journey #10 – Walking Between Worlds

Living in Hawi on the northern most point of the Big Island of Hawaii was beautiful and isolated. House sitting for friends on their 12 acre sanctuary was heaven on earth. I was deeply grateful to be surrounded by tropical fruit orchards and abundant flowering plants and trees, coy ponds with crystals and lotus flowers, egrets flying, cows and horses in the fields, and breathtaking views of Maui and the Pacific Ocean in the distance. My favorite thing was gazing at the infinite stars in the dark night sky. I felt at one and connected to the Universe as if I were walking between the worlds. At times I also experienced isolation, aloneness and felt small.  My so called problems and life seemed insignificant in the grand scheme of things, like I was an ant invisible in an ant hill. It was a valuable yet often uncomfortable perspective that threatens the ego and invites the spirit at the same time.

The Hawaiian Islands are the most isolated place on Earth. The closest land is about 2500 miles in any direction. It can feel like heaven or hell on earth, depending on your perspective. I loved the peace and quiet, beautiful nature, expansive, nurturing energy of the land and fresh air, and being away from my life on the mainland. However, the longer I was there the more I was BEING in the quiet and not DOING and staying busy. I was reminded of how much I was driven to distraction my entire life. My New York, type A personality and east coast upbringing was still running me even though I was thousands of miles away in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. The expression, “You can take the girl out of NY but you cannot take the NY out of the girl” applied here. You can be in the most beautiful, peaceful and remote place in the world, yet the peace and quiet becomes deafening and uncomfortable when the voices of self-judgement, doubt, old stories and the ego mind start to chatter. The “monkey mind” as they call it in Buddhism,  become very loud. All the issues, fears, limitations and insecurities I was running away from caught up with me on that beautiful sanctuary on the Big Island. I was faced with myself, the self I did not like to BE with, feel, acknowledge.

I sought heaven, yet was still living on Earth. As an Edgewalker I understand that life has many dimensions and WALKING BETWEEN WORLDS integrates body, mind and spirit. My sense of belonging and interconnectedness with nature, the stars and greater Universe felt easy. However I also was living in a physical body with it’s challenges, human experiences and emotions, fears and concerns.  Looking back the support I had from friends and neighbors including Jim Channon, and so much time alone provided me the much needed perspective to stop, get grounded, listen, feel and heal.  It was as if I was having an identity crises, letting go of my old world and paradigm, yet not yet knowing where my new life and Source of Self would come from. Little did I know that my authentic self was within me waiting to be revealed. I had been searching all my life for the very thing that had been within me from birth and beyond, my Divinity, my spiritual heart, my soul. I began peeling away the layers as the journey of transformation continued.

**Lessons:

*No matter where you go there you are. You cannot run from yourself.

*Give space and time to the parts of you that want to be seen, heard, expressed.  You are worthy and deserving of your love, compassion, patience and nurturing. Watch, observe, breathe and allow. As you reclaim your wholeness you reclaim your life.

*Paradise is an inside job. We can create heaven on earth when we find peace and acceptance within ourselves first.

 

 

 

Walking on the Leading Edge #4 – Evolutionary Leaps of Faith

In the Hawaiian culture ‘ohana means family, including blood relatives, extended family and intentional community. The concept of ohana emphasizes that families are bound together and members must cooperate and remember one another. I was about to connect with and learn from my Hawaiian spiritual family in magical, synchronistic ways!

After my dolphin swim I did not feel the same. My energy was expansive, open, willing. I was calm and more aware of my self and surroundings in a way I had never experienced before. In my curiosity and vulnerability I asked Life, The Universe, for a sign to guide and direct me to what, who, where was next.
I intentionally chose to cultivate my Edgewalker skill of Sensing the Future, staying open and expectant to the CEO (Clear, Easy, Obvious) response.

I randomly opened a book on Hawaiian health, healers and retreats. A photo of a man named Jim, looking very familiar, stared back at me. He was living on the northern side of the Big Island in a town called Hawi. As I read about his work as a global consultant speaker and retreat leader I realized I met him at a World Business Academy in Santa Barbara many years before. Coincidence? No, a Divine sign. I decided to contact him and he suggested we meet in Hawi.

As I was driving north to meet Jim I got a call on my cell phone from Bonnie, a good friend in Naples, Florida. She mentioned her dear friends Joel and Michele who lived part time on the Big Island and owned Kohala Sanctuary in Hawi. The Divine Timing of her call as I was driving to the same town to meet Jim was incredible. Jim and I met in a local coffee shop in Hawi and instantly connected, reflecting on the conference we both attended years ago. While at the coffee shop I also noticed a beautiful woman who I felt connected to yet did not have an opportunity to meet. Jim introduced me to Joel and Michele who were his neighbors at the Kohala Sanctuary. It was a magical moment, leading me to the next place on my journey.

Michele and Joel invited Jim and I to their 12 acre Kohala Sanctuary – paradise on earth! When I walked onto the deck of their home I noticed the beautiful woman Mayra from the coffee shop, my future soul sister from Austria, sitting there. It turns out she also knew them and was having a retreat on their land. As I stepped out to look at the breathtaking vista of the Pacific Ocean and acres of lush gardens of fruit, flowers and vegetables I remembered seeing this view in a vision months before I left Florida when I was on a labyrinth walk. At the time I set the intention to be guided on my Edgewalker Journey of the unknown to what is next in my life. This exact view was clearly shown to me at the time yet I had no way of knowing where it was or what it would mean to me in the future.

Tears were in my eyes and as I turned around to see the dear friends who were the beginning of my Hawaiian ohana, my heart and soul tribe – Jim, Joel, Michele, Mayra. “Welcome Home” they said. Michele and Joel shared they had been praying for someone to come and live in their house, dog sit and live on their property for the Summer months for free. “You are that person. Are you interested?”
This was not in my plan. My decision was unclear in that moment, however I was open, curious, excited and terrified! There is an expression “If you want to make God laugh, make plans.”

*Lessons:

*Set an intention and ask for what you want, even if you are not clear.
Say it out loud, write it down, act as if. Go for it and play big!

*Speak the Mantra – “THIS OR SOMETHING BETTER” after each prayer or intention. The Universe opens a bigger space and co-creates with you to fill in the blanks with creative solutions and abundant blessings.

*Prepare for the unexpected. Allow life to dazzle you with it’s magic and messages!

Walking on the Leading Edge: My “Edgewalker” Journey 3

Sometimes the best mode of transportation is a “Leap of Faith”.  Mine continued on June 1, 2007 on a one way flight from Naples, Florida to Kona, Hawaii. When I landed at midnight  I literally and figuratively felt like I was in the dark. I began to have second thoughts about my decision. What was I doing on the Big Island of Hawaii in the middle of the Pacific Ocean? I knew no one and had no future long term plan, no past possessions and no home to speak of. I was in the void,the unknown and at the same time felt empowered.  I was curious, open to a new adventure and chapter in my life. Little did I know that my Hawaiian “ohana”, friends and community, were waiting for me with open arms and hearts to welcome me to the islands.

When I awoke the next morning in the  beautiful home I rented I was surrounded by an abundance of nature I had never experienced before.  Sounds of tropical birds and the smells and sights of exotic  flora and fauna were a feast to my senses. Any uncertainty I had felt about my decision to come to Hawaii was dispelled.  I intentionally rented a house near Kealakekua Bay,  a favorite local spot to swim with the dolphins in the wild and one of the main reasons I was called to Hawaii. I have always loved and felt drawn to dolphins as I sensed they had a message for me.

I arranged a dolphin snorkeling swim on a small boat with my local guide Joan Ocean. To my amazement I had the opportunity to swim with about 30 spinner dolphins. As they were encircling me, looking me in the eye, I felt their energy, playfulness and magnificence envelop me.  I was crying in my snorkel, overwhelmed by the feelings and love that I felt. As we connected I was also invited to swim and play with them. My “Edgewalker” qualities of playfulness and connection naturally expressed with the dolphins.

When I got back on the boat Joan shared that clearly I had been called to Hawaii which included connecting with the dolphins. She explained that dolphins, and the Hawaiian Islands, call to certain individuals when it is their time to change, shift, evolve.  My “Edgewalker” quality of Self-Awareness allowed me to listen, hear, and act on that calling. The process of disengaging from my former  life, persona and identity created a fertile environment for Hawaii and the dolphins to initiate me.  Over the next 10 years I would transform spiritually, emotionally, and physically.  The shift that began to occur from the dolphin exchange happened almost immediately. My entire body, my energy felt completely different after the dolphin swim. It was so intense that I had to take a few days off to relax and integrate.

The local Hawaiians say the islands either “chew you up and spit you out, or embrace you.” Little did I know that I was being embraced and supported to grow and evolve in ways I could have never imagined.  This also included the difficult process of letting go of the parts of me that no longer served my life. Over time they got “chewed  up and spit out”. I surrendered to the unknown, scary and full of possibility, one magical day and one precious moment at a time.

Lessons:

*When we are aligned with our true path, our authentic calling, LIFE supports us.

*Learn to listen to and hear your intuitive voice, trust it and act on it’s wisdom. It is never wrong.

*Letting go of the old is necessary to create space for the new.

 

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